The Spitter: A Tale About Naivety and Naughtiness

As a young mother, I must confess that I was very naive, and I guess sometimes I still am, but so much worse then! I really thought that these sweet little toddlers that I had seen grow up since the innocence of infancy, would always do just what their mother told them and stay true to their character- at least the character that they portrayed in front of me. (I snicker at my lack of good judgment here.)

My oldest had always been the "law-abiding citizen". For him, things were black or white, right or wrong. I was aware that he had a stubborn streak, but in my pride, I thought that I had thus far been successful in curving that stubborn streak towards righteousness. If he was going to be stubborn, I wanted him stubborn about doing good and right, and stubbornness there would suit me just fine.

My second-born son had been the restless one, the creative one. It was he who discovered that underwear looked cool spinning around on the ceiling fan, after all. It was also he, that as a little toddler had shocked me one day when he climbed up on the couch, walked across it to the other end, stood on the end table, and jumped. I remember saying to him; "Are you new here? We don't do that." He was totally the opposite of his older brother. The rules didn't come natural to him. He had to figure them all out. He never liked "being in trouble" but he didn't automatically know that you don't do certain things, like dip your toothbrush in the toilet and that sort of thing.

Now that you have the "background", on to the story!

For several weeks after baby boy #3 was born, the restless-creative, second-born had been getting into lots of trouble for a naughty habit he had developed that he was using primarily at church. The habit? Spitting. Remember, he's also the creative one so he developed ways to do this that I can't even describe! 

I would be holding the baby and enjoying every lady in the church gushing over his blonde hair and blue eyes when I would hear "that sound" behind my back or my older child, the law-abiding citizen, saying; "Mom, he's doing it again."

This had become a routine for weeks. I would be talking, he would start spitting, and off to the car we would go with promises of the trouble he would find himself in once we were in the safety of our home. He would fret all the way home, because he KNEW that I always kept these kinds of promises. But the problem that kept really frustrating my mind was- why does he keep doing this?!?!  He hates getting "in trouble", he loathes this drive home knowing what's coming, and he does know quite well that I'm not going to let this slide.

Now, before I go on, do any of you wise-by-nature-mothers know what could have possibly been going on?

A hint: the creative one was often creative to get a laugh or shock out of the law-abiding, older brother.

(The hint helps to know how this surely must have gotten started.)

Another tip: Don't worry so much about the "wild one"- the toddler who is busy, but be much more concerned with the child who says, "I may be sitting down on the outside, but I'm standing up on the inside!"

Well, thankfully, I had a very good friend at church who had the guts to point out something to me one day after watching this event unfold for weeks herself. ...And I say guts, because there are some people who get downright angry when you tell them their little angels did something that could even be considered wrong. ...Now I must admit, when she told me the truth of the matter, I was very embarrassed that I had somehow been missing this, but I was THANKFUL to her for telling me the truth as I was then able to solve this problem (and a few more) within ONE day.

Now for the truth:

My friend said, "Uhm, Donna, come here for a second."  "What is it?"   She said; "I don't know if you know this, but Keenan (the law-abiding one) is telling Krestan (the creative one) to spit like that."  I gasped and said, "You're kidding!" She shook her head with a smile, both of us almost laughing. I said, "Ew, when I get him home...." She said, "I hate it for him," with a wink. I then thanked her for telling me, knowing that it might have been 30 more years before I caught onto this!

What had been happening behind my back had probably started as a slight and silly gesture from the creative one, but seeing the shock on the law-abiding one's face, and the laugh he got, he probably did it a few more times until I caught him. Then, the law-abiding one, loving to laugh and get his brother in trouble, had continued to provoke the creative one, week after week to get the "shock-n-laugh" that they both so loved. Funny thing, as soon as the law-abiding one had to "pay the piper", it wasn't so funny anymore.....and funnier still; he didn't have the guts to do these naughty acts himself, but to my embarrassment, he didn't mind someone else doing them for his pleasure!

The moral of the story 

for the Naughty One:

Be sure your sins will find you out!

For the Naive One:

We all have a sin nature...."all we like sheep have gone astray.."

Still to this day, I'm thankful to that friend. My oldest would be 'bitten' many more times by that same spirit before he became an adult and had I not been made aware of that nature within him, I might not have dealt with him as I should have.

Prov 5:23  He shall die without instruction; and in the greatness of his folly he shall go astray.

"Have We Forgotten How To Raise Boys Into Men?"

That is the title of an article that I read a few weeks ago on Fox. It was written by William Bennett, whom many educators and conservatives appreciate. It is a post promo for his book but it also has some thought-provoking statistics for those of us with a quiver full of boys!

Thought some of you might enjoy the read.

Here's a few of his other books that we've enjoyed:

A Unique and Free Civics Class for Your Whole Family

WTN, our local conservative talk-radio station, is hosting a unique but very informative program. I learned the other day about some very interesting things that were in the Constitution of my state. 1) A minister was held in high esteem and could only run for local office and not for the State as nothing could be allowed to come between him and his profession. 2) Anyone who professed atheism or disbelief in The Word of God was not allowed to hold office. Without Biblical morals, how could they rule justly?

Here's a link to the page where you can listen to the audio from Professor (and former State Representative) David Fowler, view notes, and there's even a test. They encourage you to do this as a family, which I think is very neat for homeschoolers! You can even receive your own WTN University diploma

Lots of history, Founding Fathers info, and Truth!

When Queens Ride By- free ebook

You may remember this story from Brandy's site. It is really thought-provoking for every woman and mother.
I was tickled to see it in this format and FREE! It loaded quickly for me in PDF.
I think you'll find it a blessing!

Teach Your Children Well: The Difference Between Success and Failure

I wanted to share a tough lessen with you, dealing with teenagers.

There are lessons that will come, that will be harder on you than them. I never thought that was true, but it is.

One of my boys was given the job of mowing the front and sides of our lawn. He had been wanting to have
more responsibilities as a teenager. (Well, that's not exactly what he said. This comes out differently from the mouth of a teenager. It sorta sounds like; "What difference does it make getting older? I don't get to do anything else." ;-)

Well, he mowed the lawn the first time and we complimented him on how well he had done. Everything was neat and good.

But the second time he mowed, he skipped an area where he needed to move a few things. He didn't move them and he didn't mow this tiny little area.

Now, many parents would not want to exert the energy to deal with this and would shrug it off. Other parents would not want to 'hurt their feelings' so they would simply 'let it go'.

But you who seek to train up a child in the way he should go know in your heart that this cannot be passed over.

THIS is an opportunity to teach your child the difference between success and failure. Successful people pay attention to detail. Prudence mandates that little things not be shrugged off.

The hard part for you? Deny what pity would have you do. Pity for your child says; "Don't make him fix it, just tell him." But dear mother, it is only in "fixing it" that he can feel the job is well-done. Seeing his error, his conscience would demand that it be made right, so allow it. If his conscience is not working, then demand it, so that his conscience will be affected in the future. You want to shape more than outward behavior, you want to shape his heart.

The Bible teaches these principles.

Eccl 9:10  Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with thy might...

Eph 6:5-8  Servants, be obedient to them that are your masters according to the flesh, with fear and trembling, in singleness of your heart, as unto Christ; Not with eyeservice, as menpleasers; but as the servants of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart;  With good will doing service, as to the Lord, and not to men: Knowing that whatsoever good thing any man doeth, the same shall he receive of the Lord, whether he be bond or free.

Col 3:23  And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men..

-love in Christ


*This post is linked to Far Above Rubies/ Domestically Divine Tuesdays.

Living the Frugal Life Doesn't Mean That You Can't Make Wonderful Memories!

Here's a book that has inspired me and encouraged me for years:



These ladies have put together some great ideas for just about every Holiday.
Many of them are low-cost or no-cost.

More About Calcium Egg Shell Broth...

My other post about this gives the exact instructions for this, as per the Bulk Herb Store, but I wanted to show you something else you can do with these.(Shoshanna does a video and uses them like this.)

You can freeze them in pop molds or ice trays.

Use them in smoothies, slushies, soups, or even to chill your drinks!

Once Upon a Time....

 

A man came home from work and found his three children outside, still in their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers strewn all around the front yard. The door of his wife's car was open, as was the front door to the house and there was no sign of the dog. 

 

Proceeding into the entry, he found an even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked over, and the throw rug was wadded against one wall. In the front room the TV was loudly blaring a Cartoon channel, and the family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing. 

 

In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was spilled on the counter, the fridge door was open wide, dog food was spilled on the floor, a broken glass lay under the table, and a small pile of sand was spread by the back door. 

 

He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of clothes, looking for his wife. He was worried she might be ill, or that something serious had happened. He was met with a small trickle of water as it made its way out the bathroom door. As he peered inside he found wet towels, scummy soap and more toys strewn over the floor. Miles of toilet paper lay in a heap and toothpaste had been smeared over the mirror and walls. 

 

As he rushed to the bedroom, he found his wife still curled up in the bed in her pajamas, reading a novel. She looked up at him, smiled, and asked how his day went. 

 

He looked at her bewildered and asked, 'What happened here today?' She again smiled and answered, 'You know every day when you come home from work and you ask me what in the world do I do all day?' 'Yes,' was his incredulous reply. She answered, 'Well, today I didn't do it.