Monday, March 2, 2009

Dealing with Divorce part 5

STOP being selfish!
You can't control the other person but you CAN control yourself!

Your happiness, your loneliness, your comfort, your feelings, and on and on... are LAST! You enlisted in last place when you put yourself in a position to become a parent. You HAVE to get over it and what you can't get over you have to FAKE!

The world will tell you things like; "You must make time for yourself. You have a right to be happy. You should date. You have to put yourself first sometimes." But I'm telling you that you must put your children first.

I heard of an adult one time who said, in reference to their own children; "if I put them first, then I'll never have anything!" Doesn't that sound all grown up? No it does not but it does capture the essence of what I am saying.

The children's feelings, needs, wants, and desires must be put above your own. This includes your desires to want to argue back with your ex and even defend yourself verbally; it cannot be done. If the child's ears are around, protect them!

Be the 'grown up' and 'wear' this attitude: "its all about my kids".

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